Have you ever had a breakdown that completely crumbled the vision that you have of yourself?
Do you think it was for you to learn something? Or against you?
We will dive deep into what happens when a really hard situation affects, like, almost everything in your life.
Our guest is Amberly Lago, a leading expert in the field of resilience, transformation, and health and wellness. She is a former professional dancer and athlete, bringing a new perspective on what it takes to persevere. She is the best-selling author of “True Grit and Grace” and empowers people worldwide by sharing how she turned a tragedy into triumph.
Why? You might wonder…
Well, she went through a really life-changing situation multiple times. Hit by an SUV when going by bike when she thought she finally got the California Dream.
A chance of a leg amputation, a serious nervous system illness that came with it.
Adding to that, she earned her living through fitness.
And when everything happened, the first thing she thought about was how to keep coaching her clients with crutches!
Then, a lot of pain. In and out, therapy, and a lot of meds, she labeled herself as the fitness girl, sponsored by Nike… everything was about fitness.
At first, she said with each struggle: this isn’t the vision I had for myself. And then started to do many things: meds, fitness, physical therapy… a HUGE struggle to keep her profession as a fitness coach.
Although that is some part of what got her out of her worst moments, later on she found out more about what resilience was.
I admit that listening to her; I went into my worst moments. Admiration and respect are what come to my mind, as well as a little sadness.
Keep pushing forward is something that is already “supposed to” when you are being resilient to something.
And even, you can get happy when you get to the next stage, as Amberly was when she got on her crutches for the first time after the accident!
You might be empowered by how resilient she is!
But, can you be resilient from vulnerability? Kristina adds this distinction, and it is relevant because the whole point of Amberly’s work is that you can become resilient not just by PUSHING, but also by being in PEACE when doing that, before or after.
Radical acceptance is an essential component of it.
Amber had to stop and listen when her husband wasn’t happy about her thinking she accomplished a goal by getting on crutches…
Listening and acknowledgment lead to acceptance. And acceptance can be the first step to a different way of being resilient!
You can even have limiting beliefs that prevent you from stepping into acceptance. A lot of people are and were raised into pretending that nothing happened and putting on a happy face!
Can you relate? This can create the limiting belief that living in acceptance is not what is acceptable in society and feeling REALLY lonely.
Amberly speaks in her book about the five steps for PEACE as a spiritual toolkit for resilience:
- Perspective: it begins with gratitude. Including always something to be grateful for in your day is going to get you ready to be at peace with something, at least.
- Acceptance: freedom lies in the acceptance of the situation. Acceptance allows you to do something about it coming from the truth.
- Engage with your community: love and play. Light the people you love with joy! Connection is the way to make you feel empowered!
- Endurance: a total expert, Amberly!
- Rest: Resting doesn’t mean quitting.
Sometimes you feel like you have this 1 percent chance of getting something. Will you give up?
That is why it is essential to rest. If you’re not giving up on your success, you deserve doing it in peace and resting.
But that may seem to you that is not being resilient.
Amberly herself admits she is no good at it!
We spoke a lot about resilience to illness and physical resilience. What about resilience to achieve our goals in life?
Amberly is a fan of the sentence “work smarter, not harder”. That is easier said than done, right?
Especially when you have to show yourself, your personality, your abilities. When you get evaluated!
I’m sure you have felt the Impostor’s syndrome in some way when trying to launch a project!
Also, trying to achieve a professional goal?
Or even, with a hobby result that you want to show your friends?
That is because of our inner critic, which sometimes doesn’t allow us to thrive in the way that could be possible for us.
What can we learn from this? Is also a valid question in this scenario.
Also, not giving up!
Being gentle with yourself, though. That means, setting attainable goals.
Also, that means not doing things alone. Look for people who can support you in your goals.
First, go to people who paved their way to success! They can give you advice from experience, even though no roadmap is the same!
That means seeking COUNSEL, not opinion.
Opinion is what some people, even closest ones, can give to you!
“You cannot do it; why do you attempt that?”
The voices in your mind labeled as inner critic can surely relate to that and be acknowledged by what other people think!
On the other hand, there might be good opinions: for example, they can have an opinion on the color of your website.
None of that matters much to achieving your goals!
What matters is looking for counseling from someone who knows the road and the pitfalls along the way.
Or, do a course with people that are awesome at what they do! Amberly took one of the best courses in writing when she decided she was going to write a book.
Another kind of support you can get is fellow coworkers, friends, and entrepreneurs who might be experiencing similar pitfalls along the way.
The chitchat when you’re working solo with other fellow entrepreneurs is a soothing experience for the loneliness you can feel sometimes by doing a lot of writing and thinking on your own.
How we connect matters and gives us a more peaceful way to use peaceful resilience to accomplish our business, health, and life goals!
• Amberly Lago | Instagram
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• Amberly Lago | LinkedIn
• Amberly Lago | Website
I have been a personal growth enthusiast since I can remember! Mindvalley follower since 2015 and practitioner, I support with my writing female entrepreneurs and brands in the personal growth industry; I am a proud editor of this blog!